I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
