I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
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