I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
