i would punch a child for taco bell
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
PS: I just woke up from my shower
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
