i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
