Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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