I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
