I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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