wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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