No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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