I'm gonna have a badass scar
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
