Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
