he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
