Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
