you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize