is this the sara with the beer cane?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
my poor anus
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize