Im at strip club and am horny
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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