the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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