do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
