hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
