He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
