I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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