ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
