weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
