I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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