So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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