any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Let's paint friendship bongs
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
