Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
