Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
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