Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize