Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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