How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
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