So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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