I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
