Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'm always down for nudity.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
