it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
