Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
