lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
i out mim tonsoeep
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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