i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Blood and glitter go together right?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
