dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Someone signed my nipple.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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