susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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