I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
