Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
