i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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