There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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