I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
