So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
