I feel like I'm in dance class right now
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
