I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
