if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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